Welcome to my weekly Dear So and So letters. These are the letters I wish I could have sent this week. It is my little soap box way of dealing with weekly craziness.
Dear Drive Thru Time Waster,
The drive through is here for convenience, it should be quick. My hubby was waiting in the line behind two cars. You were right in front of him. You could clearly see the menu from your vantage point. When you got to the speaker box, you had no idea what to order! What were you doing while waiting? You changed your order 3 times holding the line up. To make matters worse, when you reached the payment window – you had to dig for money and were still digging after hubby placed his order and came behind you. I bet you use the express line in the store with too many items too.
I am wondering what is your policy on bagging purchases, especially clothes. I purchased two pants and two shirts the other day along with cleaning chemicals, pet food and other items. I was careful not to place my clothes on the filthy register belts and handed them directly to the cashier. I watched in horror as she placed them back on the belt to scan the tickets. She then took the hangers off and rolled the clothes around her hands in a little ball and shoved, and I mean shoved, them in the bags right next to the chemicals. I had little balls of clothes. I stopped the customer service manager on the way out to inquire about this and was told, there is no bagging policy but we should treat customer’s purchases with more respect. Humpf…..I think you should treat my money to your store with more respect too! I returned all my balled up clothes.
Dear Soon to be Ex Mrs. McCourt,
You may be the wife of the Dodgers owner going through an ugly divorce, but seriously – you want a million dollars a month in spousal support? Dream on! I say sell some of those homes you do not even use. You have a home that is empty that you use only the swimming pool? You have a home that you use just for dinner parties? You have like 4 or 5 homes total all for different reasons. Well get used to a kiddie pool, shopping at Walmart, and a drive thru dinner. Maybe you will be behind the Drive Thru Time Waster.
Dear Nigerian Email Scammers,
I thank you for all the millions of dollars I have won, and then for the emails where you ask for the money back to help. I thank you for all the out of country lottos I have won and the packages you are sending to me that I have to verify. I ask you – does anyone ever really fall for these things? Could you use the time you waste on these internet scams to do something more productive? If there is any country that should ban internet access it should be yours. Congratulations you have just won the pleasure of seeing my delete button in action!
You have been on your very best behavior lately. You stay away from my chocolate, pick up your laundry, help in the kitchen etc. When I thanked you for it, you said ” I am scared I will be on Dear So and So ”
Have a great week everyone!